I’m finally able to sit longer to write a post. I think. Missed me? I missed blogging and I apologize for not being able to post sooner or to answer the emails.
A routine checkup last Sunday ended with me being admitted to the hospital again. The miscarriage that I had (that I thought and the doctors thought) last week, wasn’t a miscarriage at all – it was bleeding due to an ectopic pregnancy.
Here’s a diagram to show what is ectopic pregnancy:
Photo credit: Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research
The fertilized egg for normal pregnancies (those that have happy endings) implant in the uterus while for ectopic pregnancies, the fertilized egg implants somewhere else (in my case, the right fallopian tube) and grows there. If undiscovered, it would grow like an embryo of a normal pregnancy would and would rupture the woman’s tube, some ending in tube being severely damaged, completely taken out, could cause hemorrhage and even death.
My HCG levels were already suspicious and a scan last Sunday showed a 1.4 cm growth in my right tube. I checked in and the doctor told me I need to have an injection called Methotrexate to terminate the pregnancy, to “kill the baby”. She repeated that last phrase over and over that I asked her to please choose other words if she can. She then chose ïnduced abortion” thereafter. For ectopic pregnancies, doctors tend to focus much to saving the mother’s life, forgetting that there’s one life that has to end in exchange.
I was already grieving with the thought that I lost a baby through natural miscarriage so this ectopic pregnancy-induced abortion thing came as a shock.
At 8:00 pm on the day I was admitted, a nurse came to administer the Methotrexate injection (that med to terminate the life inside me). It felt like a death sentence and it didn’t help that I received the syringe needle was so big, probably the biggest I’ve had so far. I waited for the worst. Would I wince in pain? Would it feel like I’m in labor? Would I pass a lot of blood? What would be the side-effects? The doctor assured me that there are only very few people suffer with the side-effects and since I’m healthy and all, and very early in my pregnancy (only 4 weeks), I should be ok. I felt confident and had a good night’s sleep.
So little did I know.