When this post goes live, I’ll probably be up in the air aboard Turkish Airlines, bound for Istanbul. I’m part of a group of bloggers/media invited for a trip to the historical city of Istanbul (and report back what we’ve seen there or Tweet/Instagram live from the location).

How cool is it?

As of this writing, my husband has called me 5 minutes ago to ask what cake I like? Chocolate? Red Velvet? Plain old vanilla? No, he is not celebrating my going-away-for-the-weekend. It’s actually my birthday on the 22nd (Friday) and it’s the first time in years that I’m away from family.

In fact…maybe it’s the first time that I’m celebrating it alone. So we’re having a little celebration at home, in advance.

No biggie, though but what’s big deal for me (still is) is Benjamin. Yeah, punch me for I am that kind of mother who paces back and forth trying to make a decision to go or not to go, convinces herself it’s ok to go, decides to go and then feels guilty of going.

I’m 100% female. I have a fickle mind. And then, I am also a mother. I worry. I feel guilty when I spend time for myself.

I know I’m going to enjoy this little break and Benjamin will be alright and perhaps the thought that he might not even remember he was mom-less for three days when he grows up is calming me a bit…but I digress. I know I will terribly miss the little guy I’ve been sleeping with for the past two years or so. How can a hotel pillow ever replace that?

Oh shut up, I tell myself over and over again. He will be alright, he will be alright. On the other hand, maybe I am not going to be alright – you know, weaning him suddenly like this. I’d have cabbage leaves under my bra in the middle of Turkish winter.

Whew.

Even then, I’ll be a proper grown up and keep my cool so stay tuned for photos and stories of the trip by subscribing to this blog (enter your email address at the box at the top of the right sidebar), following me on Twitter, Instagram and Liking the Sandier Pastures Facebook page!