As a full time working mother, the time I spend with Pristine at home is very limited so as much as possible, I would like to spend that time wisely and with quality. I don’t want to spend it on scoldings, what kind of parent would want to do that all the time. I would like to spend my evenings with her reading, baking together in the kitchen or playing happily.
Pristine’s really been a good child so far. Heck, we never passed that infamous “terrible two’s” stage and she never munched on electric wires as a baby either. She listens, she follows and she never talks back (she does write letters expressing her opinions, though). We never, almost never raise our voices on her. That’s how blessed we are. But as she ages, we’re finding ourselves meeting some parenting obstacles. Of course, this just shows that there is no really perfect person or child and that parenting is not all bed of roses.
School started last week. She loves going to school and have been getting really good grades and her teachers have nothing but good things to say about her performance in class. Since last week, she’s brought home assignments and we expect her to do it even when we’re not there (the husband and I are working parents and she’s left with my mom at home). I go home at 6:30 pm, cook dinner, check up on her, etc.
Since last week, everyday, she’s only doing her homework only AFTER I asked her to. Mind you, it’s just a one page homework. Last night, I was really ticked off.
My parents never had to nag me about my homework when I was in school. I’d do it diligently right after I come home , right BEFORE anyone asks me to or before I do any sort of play and small household chores I was assigned to. I know it’s not fair to measure my daughter using the yardstick of my youth but I also know that school assignments are her own responsibility. That she can’t go far in life if she waits around – waits around to be told to do something, that is.
But mom, once I do it, I can do it very, very quickly!
I was furious. It’s true, once she tackles things, she does it well and fast. But as a mom who wants the best for her, I am frustrated. Being able to do it well and very quickly is meaningless UNTIL you initiate action. That crucial first step is very important. How can I ever drill this thought in her young mind?
Moms out there, how do you deal with children slacking with homework?
Hmmm, if you can teach her that she will feel less stress/pressure by getting her work done first that would be great. But I do know that some people work better under pressure. I never did my work until the last minute and always passed just fine – graduated 3.8 GPA from college.
Just sayin’, maybe she’s different than you! 😉
Everyone of us has our own personality. I think she could not yet understand you because at her age. I know you just wanted only the best for your child. I would suggest that explain to her the things that she still needs to know. Maybe time will come that she will understand why you are doing those things and she will know that it’s for her own sake.
Well I’m not a mum, but this is what I suggest. It worked for me. I had a specific homework time. My routine as I remember it before I got shipped off to boarding school was:
After school I could play
Come in for supper
homework immediately after supper,
had to finish homework and get it checked
allowed to read until lights out.
Note no TV until I was 16.
I would suggest a specific 1/2 hour or whatever it takes at the same time everyday. Just my 2 cents
.-= Seb´s last blog ..Decor Books =-.
I am with you about expecting her to do her homework, as it is her only major responsibility! Maybe this is the time to figure out what habits/routine that really works for her… And then maybe, she wants you included in her homework/study routine …
When I was still in school, I found the study routine that really works for me – taking a nap after school until dinner time, then study/homework time from dinner to bedtime. Then bedtime depends on the time I finish studying, which is usually past midnight, which is okay since I had that nap before dinner.
Good luck … I hope too that when it’s my turn to instill good study habits to my kids, I’d remember this post, and ponder on it …
.-= Charlotte | Life’s a Charm!´s last blog ..TV is my Guilty Pleasure =-.
My approach would be somewhat different. Let your child figure out why it’s important to do homework in a timely fashion on her own. I think, after all, a teacher’s wrath is somewhat worse than a mother’s.
Start by setting out a guidelines for a routine and then let her take the initiative to make it happen. A little trust goes a long way and has proven to show a well-rounded young adult a little later in life.