by findingbackroads

if only I didn’t have to dye

I’m supposed to write feel good stories on Mondays. After all, it is the first day of the week for most people. But not for me – I start working on Saturdays so Mondays are like, mid-week for me already which means I am allowed to spiral downwards, like now.

Today’s general crappy issue revolves around my head being so smelly you’d think it’s a toxic chemical waste dump. I hate dyeing (funny it almost resonates like ‘dying’, which what I might be feeling right now) but have to do it every six weeks now because my hair is turning gray faster than I imagined. Goodness, I am just 32. Thirty two year olds should not have gray hair YET, right? Or they do now? Am I missing something? But what do I know, my father had a full head of white hair at 35 (and was always mistaken as my 7 yr old sister’s grandfather instead of her daddy).

The point is, if only my hair isn’t graying, I wouldn’t have to dye it, buy boxes of dye on sale for crying out loud!, I shouldn’t have stayed late last night trying to make it look better, trying to hide the white hairs sticking out when I pony tail my long hair…if only I didn’t have to do all those things, Pristine wouldn’t have that big,  purple contussion on her head right now.

You didn’t see that coming did you. I didn’t, either. This is one of those days where I feel like I’m a bad mother.

I was washing my hair in the sink and she was watching me, amazed at the mud like color of the water as I rinsed the dye out. I told her it was late, please go back to the room, select the books for bedtime reading and wait for me there. She immediately said ok, being the obedient girl she is. She turned back and BAAAM!

She hit the half-opened/half-closed bathroom door right behind her. I did not realize the door wasn’t completely open. It was when I last saw it. She didn’t cry. I don’t know if it’s out of total shock or because she felt dizzy or something. I kept saying Oh my God! oh my God! while at the back of my mind, my brain was screaming, “calm down, freak! Go run to get ice!” . I ran to get ice.

Almost immediately, a big contusion developed in her forehead like a mountain rising at a speed of 100 meters per second. The color was horrible – purple, then blackish. It looks painful but she said it’s not so. It was late at night and my mom was already asleep in her room. My husband wasn’t there. I trembled, I was so scared I didn’t realize I was crying. I do not do well during emergencies, that’s why I NEVER chose to become a nurse or doctor.

Or I should’ve forced myself to be so I can deal with these kind of things better?

She was still talking normally (which is a good sign) but still not crying (bad sign in my book). I was battling the urge to call an ambulance if the contusion growth didn’t slow down with the ice pack.

I was there applying cold compress on her forehead, with my shirt wet with my dripping smelly hair. She fell asleep so tired after three straight days of fashion show (which I will blog later once I pick up some happy hormones somewhere). I feel so bad.

It so sucked to be me last night.

14 Comments

  1. I have a few gray hairs, nothing to be worried about. Both my parents are over 50 and they aren’t completely gray yet, s that gives me hope.

    Now I am sure your hair isn’t as bad as you think it is. 🙂

    About two weeks ago I was playing with Emma and tickling her, and somehow she turned her head and I ended up scratching her nose and making it bleed. She went around for a week(!) pointing out her cut and telling everyone I did it.

    But no matter what, it makes us moms feel horrible when our kids get hurt, especially when it is sorta our fault!

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  2. Oww.. So sorry about Pristine. Don’t feel bad. Accident happens and I think you handle it as best as you could.

    Now, as for gray hair, I have handful of those too. But I’m still too lazy to take care of it. I know I should just didn’t get the energy to do anything. Huh.. I think it must be Asian hair that then to get gray hairs sooner.

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  3. Oh Grace… I’m so sorry for the both of you. I think every mother in the world feels that way at some time and it’s only because we’re humans. Sadly.
    I don’t do well in emergencies either sweetie… I pretty much panic.
    As far as gray hair, I started getting gray right about the same age. It’s not your fault Grace, none of it. 🙂 big hug.

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  4. Oh, I’m so sorry that happened! It’s so scary when our kids get hurt, isn’t it?

    If you are comfortable with homeopathy, I’d strongly suggest you try arnica! It’s available in tablet and lotion/gel (for external application) – the lotion and gel should NOT be put on broken skin, tablets can be used any time. They are for use with trauma and bruising, and although they work best when given right away when injury occurs, arnica helps with healing after the fact too. I love the stuff and carry it with me all the time! (I have a VERY active 7 year old)

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  6. My mum was gray at 21! – she coloured it for YEARS.

    I started getting blog highlights about 4 years ago, and just need them every 6 months – the blond bits blend in well to cover the increasing gray. As a baby/young child I was blond, so seems reasonably natural (I hope) and roots don’t really show.

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  7. I would probably be good to have your daughters contusion to a doctor. Just to be sure there are no after-effects. It is also a bad sign in my book that she did not cry. And about your hair turning gray, i think it is fine to dye. Many girls dye their hairs.

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  8. Aw, poor little thing =/
    But honestly, it’s not your fault! It was just an accident-It’s just good that it wasn’t worse.
    As for the grey hair, I really don’t understand why woman dye their hair to hide the grey. I think it’s a beautiful look to carry!
    I’m sorry you had such a rough day. Hopefully it gets better from here on out 😀

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  9. Whenever foreheads get whacked like Pristine’s did…a big ole bump is actually a good thing. I know it sounds crazy to say that, BUT, it shows that the swelling is on the outside and NOT on the inside!

    Take a deep breath – and relax. All kids get bumps and bruises from time to time. This wasn’t your fault. It was just an accident, and accidents happen.

    Hope that tomorrow will be a better day!

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  13. I’m sooo sorry this happened to you both… I hope she is feeling much better. I remember the first time Nikolaus got a goose-egg on the middle of his forhead. I think I cried worse than him, too. They are much more resiliant that we think. Keep your chin up, you did nothing wrong, that’s why they are called accidents!

    I used to color my hair every 5 weeks, too. I had it done professionally because the box stuff had too much peroxide for my coarse hair to take properly… Then when I had to stop working (medically I couldn’t work anymore) it got too expensive, and I tried the home stuff again, but physically I couldn’t do it, so… had to go to the natural – YUK. Now I am 1/2 gray, wish I weren’t but have no choice, and I’m only 43, started turnin gray when I was 23! Thanks mom!!

    Hope the rest of your week is much better…Happiness to you both.

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  14. I am sorry about prinstine, but you are not bad, acciident always happens everywhere everytime.
    I read this post after the fassion show one. so I think prinstine is getting better, right?

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